You don’t know your parents and they don’t know you!
On Fathers Day, I had the best conversation with my dad that I have ever had. My father and I do not agree on many things and it has caused a lot of friction in our relationship throughout the years. This year I decided to spend an hour on the phone with him and talk, hear him out, almost like an interview.
My logic was this. Most parents do not know their children and the children do not know their parents. As we grow up and become our own person we always hide things from our parents. For reasons of fear, rejection, disapproval, ect. We always sugar coat things. I also believe parents do the same thing. Parents do not share with you their secrets, darkness, etc. Therefore you grow up as strangers.
I believe the only time you get to “know” your parents is when they are on their deathbed or after. That is the time most people open up and say what is in their hearts. Or worse, when they pass you read their journals and only then you get to really know them.
I challenged myself to be more open with my family because all throughout my 20’s I tried to hide and distance myself from my family because I knew they would disapprove of my lifestyle. My family is Mormon, I am an ex Mormon, so our values and opinions couldn’t be further apart.
Now as an adult, I want my parents to understand my point of view, why I do what I do and think like I do. I stopped caring if they would approve because at the end, this is my life and not theirs. I also think it is better to be transparent and open vs hiding out of fear. I would rather know my parents NOW and they know me, vs never having the opportunity. My hope is for my my relationship with my parents to be stronger and also I hope that by them understanding me more, they will also become more open minded to being accepting of others.
Just my thoughts this week. Let me know your thoughts on this.
Here is #HighFiveFriday 059
Quote: “Do more of what makes you better” - Me
Podcast: Jordan Harbinger Show: Howie Mandel - Conversation on mental health, talent, and perseverance.
Music: X&G, Skrillex, Boys Noize, Josh Pan: 4 Mind
Something I am doing: Reaching out to friends and family to express my gratitude.
Personal Thought: Talking about your struggles and growth can inspire someone to take action in their life. You never know who is watching.